Another intricate back-story, but isn't the space you've since designed the lair, not of the volcanic princess, but of the Gods who decided her fate? This mighty table sits in a kind of ancient conference room... nice ... but what does it have to do with your princess? I'm loathed to turn you up on your head again, but unless I'm misconstruing your synopsis, you're not designing for the right character. A secret lair is, by definition, an environment most associated with its occupant. I don't think your conference room can tell us very much about your volcanic princess - and your new synopsis doesn't seem very interested in her at all :(
I tell you what I like; a like the idea of the gods being in control of natural disasters - of deciding what could and should happen to mankind. How about your 'volcanic princess' is a spoiled little thing, who sees mankind as her playthings, and when she has a tantrum or she sulks, she can command the magma in the centre of the earth to rise up and engulf entire cities; perhaps your princess is a little brat, indulged by her parents (also Gods), who is given the world as her playset and always gets what she wants: like Verucca Salt in Willy Wonka:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRTkCHE1sS4
In this way, her secret lair could be like a playpen filled with cruel toys - her hero prop could be somekind of mechanism for making the magma come up through the ground... the point is, I think you do need to go back to the drawing board, Rhys - and maybe, if you take some of that seriousness out of your scenarios, you might have a bit more fun and freshen things up a bit...
OGR 21/11/2013
ReplyDeleteHey Rhys,
Another intricate back-story, but isn't the space you've since designed the lair, not of the volcanic princess, but of the Gods who decided her fate? This mighty table sits in a kind of ancient conference room... nice ... but what does it have to do with your princess? I'm loathed to turn you up on your head again, but unless I'm misconstruing your synopsis, you're not designing for the right character. A secret lair is, by definition, an environment most associated with its occupant. I don't think your conference room can tell us very much about your volcanic princess - and your new synopsis doesn't seem very interested in her at all :(
I tell you what I like; a like the idea of the gods being in control of natural disasters - of deciding what could and should happen to mankind. How about your 'volcanic princess' is a spoiled little thing, who sees mankind as her playthings, and when she has a tantrum or she sulks, she can command the magma in the centre of the earth to rise up and engulf entire cities; perhaps your princess is a little brat, indulged by her parents (also Gods), who is given the world as her playset and always gets what she wants: like Verucca Salt in Willy Wonka:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRTkCHE1sS4
In this way, her secret lair could be like a playpen filled with cruel toys - her hero prop could be somekind of mechanism for making the magma come up through the ground... the point is, I think you do need to go back to the drawing board, Rhys - and maybe, if you take some of that seriousness out of your scenarios, you might have a bit more fun and freshen things up a bit...